October 11, at 1: When my parents divorced at age six and, as the oldest son, seeing my family life collapse was beyond devastating. After that, throughout the next decade, I suffered sexual and physical abuse at the hands of fellow children and teachers, verbally abuse by my father and physical abuse from my mother, who could barely cope with her own divorce demons, working full time and having to raise a traumatized children a son and a daughter on her own. I never really moved on from the trauma and still carry anxiety and depression issues most likely attributed to that, having spent a turbulent adolescence getting ejected form schools and seeing counselors, to no avail. I have, more or less, forgiven my mother for the several beatings I received from her in the years following her divorce. We are very close now. With that background, it was only fitting that I would find someone as damaged and codependent as myself and marry her. To boot, she had a serious history of drug abuse that flared up once we were married. Once I discovered the extent of her drug use, my desire to have children with her immediately froze. BTW, my ex wife also believed that a couple was not a family unless they had children together, but we did have two Chihuahuas, which we agreed to split.
You should’ve asked
July 26, at 4: An ode to the power of opening up. Her hair is casually swept into a ponytail. Shes flying to Phoenix for business. Im off to Seattle for fun. She cant remember the last time shes gone on vacation.
Childfree Passions gives people who are part of the Childless community a place to find one another. You are welcome to use Childfree Passions solely as a dating site, since it has all the major features found on mainstream dating sites (e.g. photo personals, groups, chat, webcam video, email, forums, etc.).
But society, or the law, or destiny , will not let her get away with that easily. Maybe there’s a problem in the Heir Club for Men and she doesn’t want to be involved but, since she’s married to the fella needing the heir, she can’t readily escape it. Or perhaps she herself is a powerful leader who needs to give birth to a successor lest chaos follow her death. Or she’s in a society that’s gone through a Societal Disruption , which is urging every fertile woman to repopulate the species; but she has desires or concerns more important to her than the species.
Maybe she’s been prophesied to be the mother of the Chosen One or a Messianic Archetype , but she wants to Screw Destiny anyway. Maybe having babies is considered a civic duty, like a man’s serving in warfare. Or perhaps she’s part of a Breeding Cult , and bearing as many children as possible is considered her divinely-ordained role. Or maybe she’s already pregnant with the kid she adamantly doesn’t want but has had abortion forbidden her for legal, moral or health reasons.
She would rather not have children, but the law or the universe is doing its best to stop her, demanding she have children or else. There must be a serious “or else” involved. The law and the universe generally win these fights, but it still can be interesting to watch it go down.
Glamourising the ‘Childfree Life’ Ignores Reality for Most Childless Women
The burden of justification tends to rest on childless women. We rarely ask, “Why do you have kids? Some can’t stand the noise of kids. I just don’t need to own one” is a common refrain. The designation for women who feel at a young age that they aren’t mother material and then abide by that self-knowledge is early adopters. If there is a biological explanation for this impulse, or lack of one, it has yet to be discovered.
These people feel spark with a one-dimensional photograph. These people feel spark with words and even promises which in the cold light of day and in hindsight seem ridiculous to be made by someone they hardly knew. These people feel spark with what their sexual organs or their imagination tells them. For them, attraction, love, chemistry and the whole kit and caboodle have a foundation in something of nothing. There seems to be an absence of spark with action.
This is a very tricky place for you to be in. Now tell me, does your relationship history look like the fruits of telepathy? Just like the person who thinks that love is about having the power to change someone, you are giving yourself far greater powers to assess a person than you possess. That is a problem.
Childfree Are We
I’m a guy, and I’ve been attempting online dating for a good 3 years now. Currently I’m a paying member of Match, eHarmony, and OKCupid I even have my dating profile listed in 3 different places on Reddit and have a pretty good knowledge on what it’s like on the inside, and thought I’d share my perspective to those masochistic enough to want to try it.
First of all, let’s talk demographics, and remember that this is only from the male perspective. By far, the best place to find childfree people has been OKCupid.
By Catherine Pearson Getty Images For some women, deciding not to have children is relatively simple, something they’ve known in their bones for as long as they can remember. For others, it’s a decision reached later in life, either after a defining moment that snaps everything into focus or after carefully deliberating for years.
And then there are those who wait for a clear answer that never comes. We asked HuffPost Women’s Facebook community about what it’s really like to make the decision to be childfree. Here are 11 of their stories: Getting pregnant made everything clear. When I was 27, I got pregnant with a guy I was dating. I wasn’t far along, but I could already feel my body changing.
My gums were swollen and bled. My breasts were tender.
Why I Love Trump
Can a childfree woman be a hero, too? No one really knows what to do with the state of motherhood today, not even mothers ourselves. Mothers are all about selflessness and sacrifice. OK, fine, but does that make us heroes? Many people think so. I am a hero!
Discussion and links of interest to childfree individuals. “Childfree” refers to those who do not have and do not ever want children (whether biological, adopted, or otherwise).
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We schedule an event and you simply reply you will attend then log into the site on that day and time to start speed dating with other members. New Jersey is a very populated but very busy place! We need a dating site where we can meet other singles at our leisure.
Childfree Date Nights – Separating Myth from Truth
As a black, African woman, I reject white supremacy, patriarchy, and xenophobia, because to not do so would be to be complicit in my own oppression. However, I believe that my responsibility does not stop there. Still, I make choices all the time that support oppressive systems. I buy products made and sold by corporations.
Welcome to I Do NOT Want (Childfree Dating) To make a long story short, I evidently am one of the few single people who does NOT have or want kids (i.e. CHILDFREE / KIDFREE). I have tried almost everything to find that special someone, but alas, everybody I meet has or wants kids.
Luke MinnesotaSmith here again. Two lines to share with you, JB. Watch her come unglued, with NO cogent response possible. What kind of insecurities plague a woman who thinks getting married to a drug addict is good idea? What kind of delusional self-image does a woman have, if she can fall for a con artist with a gambling habit that would shame Charlie Sheen?
Be very cautious around a woman who takes none of the blame for her failed marriage. Sanguifer That, and the issue of people changing over time. Would You date someone who just parties a lot and, because of that, drinks regularly at those parties?
Ode: Divorced and dating again, childfree by choice – KWIT
Yes, I could pursue a fabulous career, courtesy of the women’s movement. I could be a hard-charging executive as well as fecund earth mother. This was no longer the ’50s, so I didn’t aspire to vacuum in pearls. In the ’70s, we instead dreamed of having it all—and “all” included children. Trouble is, I neither played with Barbie dolls nor sighed over kitties, puppies or other wee animals.
When a woman handed me her baby, asking, “Could you hold him a minute?
Childfree Dating I’m not sure if this community is still active, but I built a website that should be useful for childfree singles. I’m childfree myself and I’m active on a couple of childfree forums.
Childfree dating at EliteSingles All of our members at EliteSingles are seeking to find a deeper connection with their matches. Our childfree dating segment of users is no different. So, you can continue your first date conversation without any undue stress that your date will drop the kid-question in at any moment. This way we can assess which of our singles are going to spark immediately. So who, exactly, are the childfree singles on our site?
Does that sound like you? More dating advice Make time for dating Singles who are childfree by choice tend to lead active lifestyles. It may be a stereotype that people who are childfree have lots of spare time, but it tends to be true. Even if you’re running your own business , remember that dating requires some time set aside for potential dates. And, hey, most matches would love to go with you on any of your adventures.
Marriage-minded and childfree dating? Yes, you read that right. Most of the users on EliteSingles are looking for a long-term relationship, whether that ends in marriage or not.
My Boyfriend Broke Up with Me Because I’m Unsure About Having Kids. Should I Move On?
Australia Women decide not to have children for many reasons. Whether it be career-motivated, a lack of maternal feelings or a concern for population growth’s impact on the environment — it’s often a carefully considered decision. And we already know fewer women are having kids as each decade goes by. Data from the Australian Bureau of Statistics shows the number of childless women in the 45 to 49 age group was at 14 per cent in
In addition to checking the “no kids” box on dating sites, I would clearly bring up my childfree decision sometime in the first few dates. I was not shy about making my choice known.
Thomas Hobbes Thomas Hobbes is an Australian uni student hiding out in his mother’s basement waiting for the singularity to arrive. As a backup plan he is secretly hoping to avoid the perils of an actual career by becoming a writer and travelling the world. Following the recent attacks in Paris, immigration and multiculturalism are again in the spotlight. This is a good thing, but the discourse is as shallow as ever. We now hear arguments over what the greatest national security threat is to the West.
Is it climate change? Many others have covered this topic, but lets explore further.
Why I Love Trump
And when I do, I search the interwebs for new ideas. A little background info: My goal is to listen to all sides of an argument.
ChildfreeLove is the only website to connect and meet Childfree people. Are you looking for love? Do you need Childfree by Choice friends? Sign up now!
I’d just say I do not want kids and that be that. Even if you miiiiiiiiiiiiight want a kid or could be convinced, I’d just let that happen in time. Just stick to people who have that. No, because that’s not a goal most people who really want children are willing to compromise on. No wasting each others’ time. And we ladies who don’t want kids, we’re out there hi!